Monday, January 11, 2010

So many questions...

I haven't blogged in a while. Partially because I was wrapped up in wedding season and didn't have time but also partially from laziness. I'm going to try to be better about it though.

So I'm back into the challenges. I didn't do challenge 3 because I didn't think I had time for it, but thinking about that now it is just a ridiculous reason. There is always time to be healthy! It was just my way of copping out of something I didn't want to do. I ended up gaining 10 of the 18 pounds that I lost during the first 2 challenges just because I wanted to be lazy. I'm not going to do that again! I'm going to stick with it this time until I am happy with myself, and even then I will stick with the maintain program!

So the title of this blog is, "So Many Questions..." The reason for that is because I have SO MANY QUESTIONS about my life right now.

#1: Will I be able to have children?
This is a question that has haunted me my entire life. I know I need to give my worries and fears to God and he knows what is best for me, but sometimes that is so hard to do! This is something I am really working on. I want children SO BADLY and I would be devastated to find out that it isn't possible for me. Dustin and I officially started trying last month and unfortunately I received the dreaded monthly visitor yesterday. I know that getting pregnant sometimes takes a little time, but I was am disappointed. So I am really asking for y'all to please pray for Dustin and me! I trust God 100%, I know he knows what is best. It is just so hard to be patient sometimes.

#2 Should Dustin and I moved back to Oklahoma?
This is a major question that Dustin and I have been asking ourselves for a long time now. Kristi and Eric have decided to move back to OK. Eric really misses living there. At first, Dustin and I were like, "Well, if they are leaving we are going to leave too because we don't want to be here by ourselves!" But now we are starting to question that decision. We love it here! We decided to move to North Carolina for a reason and we still believe in those reasons. It is beautiful here, there is so much more to do here than in OK, there are more opportunities here for us and our future children, etc. We love OK too, we love the people in it. I miss my friends and family there every day. I can't imagine not living close by to my sister. She is my best friend! I think that would be the hardest thing. It's been kind of hard to meet people here, but to be perfectly honest I haven't really tried that hard. Since the idea of us moving back to OK has always been an option I haven't really tried to meet people because I didn't really see the point in it. Now that the idea of moving back to OK is so real I'm starting to think that I don't want to. The ONLY reason why we would move back to OK is because of the people in it. We miss them terribly! BUT...a lot of those people are considering moving away someday. So if we move back for them, they may not even stay there. It's such a hard decision. If we do decide to stay here I am going to make an even bigger effort to meet people. I'm going to join Junior League (A women's volunteering group) and hopefully that will help. We also haven't found a good church here yet. That is another BIG thing that will need to change.

#3 If we do stay in NC, should we move to Asheville to be closer to family?
We are also considering, if we do stay in NC, moving to Asheville. Asheville is in the mountains, only 3 1/2 hrs away from the ocean and in the same town as Dustin's aunt and uncle. It is also A LOT closer to my mom who lives in KY (Right now she lives 9 hrs away, if we move to Asheville she would be 5 hrs away.) So we need everyone's prayers again. This is a HUGE decision for us. If we move back to OK, that is it! We can't go back.

Wow. This was a long blog for me. I hope that all of you beauties are doing great with the challenge! This weekend was really hard for me. I will be praying for all of you. PLEASE PRAY FOR ME AND FOR DUSTIN!!

1 comment:

Misty said...

I understand your fears and concerns. I am so sad to read you aren't moving back (at least any time soon) I really thought you would after our last chat about it. But I can also relate more than you think on that very topic.

I will continue to pray for you and Dustin, and Kristi and Eric too. I miss you so much!!